“Sorry, just seeing this – was getting my nipples tattooed!” 

Not a text I ever thought I would send to my mother, but there it was. My family and I are pretty open when it comes to boob talk. We have to be. The threat of breast cancer runs through us like a family curse. 

When I was assessed as high-risk and decided to undergo a prophylactic mastectomy two years ago, my surgeon recommended a non-nipple sparing procedure. It was no great loss for me. I’d always hated my nipples: their shape, their color, their tendency to remind me of the high possibility of cancer lurking behind them. 

In losing them, I lost my fear—but I also lost confidence. I liked my new breasts, but not the thick, pink scars that ran across them. I was diligent about scar care, and they began to fade, but whenever I caught sight of them, I saw everything my family had been through. I didn’t regret my choice to remove my nipples, but I realized I was going to need new ones. 

My plastic surgeon offered me nipple reconstruction, but I didn’t want more surgeries, so he suggested I look for a 3D tattoo artist. I’d never gotten a tattoo, and I knew that any work I had done on my reconstructed breasts was going to be an emotional challenge, so I wanted to feel well-informed, but real-life advice from women who had gone through the process was hard to come by. 

Now that I’m the owner of two brand-new 3D areolas, I’m sharing everything you need to know if you’re considering taking this route. 

You Need The Right Artist

Through online forums and social media groups, I learned that not just any tattoo artist can create a restorative tattoo. I was advised to find a cosmetic tattoo artist to do the work and I knew I’d feel more comfortable with someone female-identifying, so I quickly honed in on Shaughnessy Otsuji at Studio Sashiko in Los Angeles. 

Shaughnessy and her husband work mostly from their flagship studio in British Columbia, traveling monthly to their LA space. When I learned that Shaughnessy was looking for areola models for her apprentice, Sullivan Hruska, I jumped at the chance to get the work done and help somebody grow in this specialist industry.

They Know What You Want (And You Probably Don’t)

I arrived at Shaughnessy’s beautiful studio in the LA Arts District on a rainy January day, just two weeks after the Eaton and Palisades fires had destroyed two parts of the city that were close to my heart. I was exhausted, my kids were still out of school, and I hadn’t had time to think about how my new nipples should look. 

Shaughnessy reassured me that most people arrive for their appointments that way. Lack of information on the areola tattoo process is one issue; online nipple censorship is another. For both artist and client, finding nipple source photos can be tricky. 

Shaughnessy and Sullivan were both prepared for me to have no idea what I wanted and, luckily, they both laughed at my slightly desperate monologue about the sickly apricot color of my original nipples and promised me a subtle pink pallet. 

Sullivan asked if I had other preferences, or if I just wanted her to go for it. 

I wanted her to go for it. 

Your Past Has Prepared You… to be Topless in Front of Strangers

Before Sullivan got started, I decided to run to the bathroom. Since I’d already happily whipped off my shirt and bra so that Sullivan could get a few “before” photos for her portfolio, Shaughnessy kindly offered to find me a robe. I told her not to worry. I don’t remember the last time I was self-conscious about my breasts. 

In fact, it never crossed my mind to feel shy during the procedure and Shaughnessy finds this is the case with a lot of her areola clients, who have had their breasts probed and prodded by rooms full of people they’ve only just met. 

You May Encounter Some Triggers

For me, the most difficult part of the experience was the outlining step, when Sullivan drew on me with a surgical marker. Looking down at the purple ink on my skin, I was reminded of the marks my surgeon had made on my breasts in the same purple ink, on the morning of my surgery. 

Sullivan finds that the experience is “deeply emotional” for her clients, but she sees them experiencing positive triggers, too. The ‘first look’ at a completed tattoo often involves happy tears, as a client responds to “seeing themselves ‘whole’ again,” said Sullivan. 

I was glad to be working with artists who were sensitive to their client’s emotional states and recommend checking Yelp reviews for any artist you’re considering so you can get a sense of their bedside manner. 

It Isn’t Painful

I regained a good amount of sensation in my breasts and I have a very low pain threshold, so I was nervous about being uncomfortable. 

While painkillers like Ibuprofen can thin the blood and hinder the tattooing process, Sullivan recommends discussing the use of a numbing solution with your artist. She applied Zensa, a topical anesthetic commonly used in cosmetic procedures, to both my breasts, and with that the pain was minimal. I winced once or twice when she was working right on top of scar tissue, but most of the time the sensation was similar to an acupuncture needle. 

Mostly, I was too busy being distracted by what Sullivan was doing. She was drawing nipples on me. And… they looked like nipples! 

It Takes A While….

I was in the studio around 2.5 hours, including consultation time. 

…But That’s A Good Thing

While Sullivan worked, with Shaughnessy overseeing every stroke of her needle, we talked. About boobs and nipples, yes, but also about the election results, our families, our jobs, Los Angeles, books—I was already naked from the waist up. What did I have to hold back on? 

I’ve spoken to other people who took the time to zone out with their headphones on: the unifying factor here is that it’s a moment to do what feels right for you. For Sullivan, connecting with her clients and knowing she’s making a difference in their lives is the most rewarding part of the job.  

“It is as much a gift for Shaughnessy and I, as it is for them,” she said. 

Aftercare Is Easy 

I left the studio with my new nipples covered in a SecondSkin bandage, which I was told to keep on for 3 to 5 days. Other simple instructions were emailed to me: I needed to dab the area several times a day with warm water on a cotton round and avoid applying any creams or cosmetics until the tattoo healed. 

I went back to the studio six weeks later for a follow-up appointment, where Sullivan assessed how the tattoos were healing and added some extra shading and color. As with my first appointment, I had no idea what needed to be done and left those decisions to the professionals. 

This Process Will Support Your Healing

As a lifelong nipple hater, I wasn’t sure I’d need replacements and, of course, not everybody does. 

I’ve met many women who are happily nipple free. I thought I might be one of them, but I accepted that I couldn’t look down at those pink scars forever. 

Leaving Sashiko, I felt rebuilt. I felt a step further from the trauma of watching so many people I love fight cancer. And, I felt like maybe I could get dressed in the mornings without reliving it all yet again. 

At my first session, I learned that I was Sullivan’s first live model for areola work. She’s accepting paid restorative tattoo clients now. I like to think we were both rebuilt a little bit, that day.